living with bipolar husband forum

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Living with bipolar throws you many challenges. he does not work , he is unable to keep any job. I will be honest and share with you that had I not had my kids (boy 13, twins 6), and was perhaps in a better financial position, I most likely would not still be here. i want to ask all who have spent years enduring this . The next day I took her to the doctor who recommended a stay in a local hospital for evaluation. He was diagnosed late last year. I am just trying to live with him and be partners through life. “His verbal abuse got so bad I just avoided him,” said Mary J. of her husband, who was recently diagnosed with bipolar disorder. I hope you all are seeing a counselor . My happiness in someways takes a back seat until they are grown. Just yesterday when he was cool and all i spoke to him about getting marriage counselling together and he said he may be ok with the idea. Laughing. With the bipolar spouse experiencing mood swings and the bipolar disorder symptoms of mania or depression at any given time, it can present a tough challenge for both the husband and wife in the relationship. To Honey Bee & Stressed in Bama, thank you for sharing your stories and advise. Dealing with a bipolar husband can be difficult, so give your time to adjust to the new challenge in your life. Here are a few simple relationship tips & ideas to keep you and your sweetheart in synch when living with bipolar … Living with a partner who has bipolar disorder can feel like living in a pressure cooker and you need some way of relieving that pressure through being able to … If you are affected by any of the issues raised you can seek help via our resources pages. I had tried to take my life by overdosing on my sleeping medication, and I was in a lot of pain. i am a full-time student who & works full time . However, he has only been 'diagnosed' as bipolar type 1 2 years ago now. Now, I am a rational person. We were also in a better place financially and yet my hubbie still felt very depressed. And what you have to get is that none of that means I don't love my husband. There is also sometimes an infectious, contagious type of quality to Bipolar Disorder when one spouse is afflicted. Although I didn’t realize it in the seventh grade, living with bipolar disorder made me feel insignificant and unwanted. There seems to be, IMHO, a difference between the way men and women relate to their own health issues. That is going to be an individual choice for you to make. He is still the loving husband and loving father that we know, just every once in a while his brain doesn t work right. he used to be a spender before , but no one knew he was bipolar. anyways here my story. 5 years ago. I know i have a tough life ahead . I know my sister's husband was far higher on the spectrum scale than my husband and he was explosive with his temper (never physical though). he just kinda lets me catch myself. But I do, and I, by having chosen to have them, have a responsibility to do EVERYTHING I can to keep all my kids family together. I pointed out if he wants to constantly complain to me about this issue (which he does), he is being hypocritical by breaking the rules here because it is easier than saying "no". My husband battles with Bipolar, ADHD and Borderline Personality. We have been together for 21 years now since I was 17 years old. I will not deny the fact that this scares me and make me wonder if anything bad could ever come of this. I know this is long and I am sorry. Living with a bipolar partner - Page 2. He doesn't acknowledge what this must be like for me - to live with a BP at ALL. I stayed on the phone with her for 12 hours as she made the trip back to home. I really do appreciate your, when i over react, which is often, if i dont catch it during the moment and realize later then i do apologize for it and admit. I see what I missed now, Loving, that you intimated too that being a man makes it harder for your husband to have the BP, that admitting to the illness is somehow emasculating. I was justified to point out what I did. Which I did calmly and respectfully.) I may not even have stayed if I hadn't had my twins. I have lived with him for 29 years and have 4 children. The non-Bipolar partner, and the marriage itself, takes on a “Bipolar life of its own” as the non-Bipolar spouse see-saws between solicitous and extreme care-giving during their Bipolar husband’s or wife’s depressive episodes, and feelings of blame, resentment, anger, and betrayal when their spouse is in the manic phase of the disorder. i cant work and when i did it wasnt for long. Bipolar is pretty serious, so he may need medications. Hello BlueFlower thanks for your comments. Noone else seemed to have the experiences I had and like you all here I have felt very lonely and also very anxious for a large proportion of my adult life because of this. Learn about the symptoms, the different phases, and even the different types. He has a strange sleep cycle where he goes to bed at about 5 or 6 in the morning, and sleeps for at least 6 hours. If I don't personally give it to him he can't remember if he has taken it or not. And while I say that, I completely accept that as a gross generalization and that real people are exceptions all the time. I am asking this question for my niece ; because she doesn't have a account ; OK Here the situation . But I don't want to continue on like this either. With a rational balanced individual it would not have. I think you identified type 1, but I am not sure what that is. I am already 47. We had lots of positive reaction and questions but some of you told us you were sorry to have missed it so I’m writing this blog for you and for all the people who sent in questions which we didn’t get a chance to answer. Well, it was like switching a light on in our lives, we now had a name and condition for why my husand and had felt these massive highs and lows since his early teens and the fact that he never felt okay in the world. But he just says he doesn't over react, I just don't see it, that this is my problem not his. My husband, who I am writing about today, doesn't acknowledge what this is like for me. just some thoughts for you. Our oldest is also diagnosed bipolar/adhd (he's 13). You see, I am constantly being told by him how he wants the kids to eat better, healthier, our groceries (which are quite healthy BTW) are frought with junk in "his" opinion during one of these pronouncements to me. 10 Tips for Coping With a Bipolar Spouse. We also suspect his father and one or both of his sisters are bipolar as he had a very turbulent family life and upbringing. he talks and acts like he has supernatural powers . today he is bit normal , not like last week . Take care and let me know how you are doing because I care. Running from a problem is an option, but never a solution. Living with bipolar disorder gives you a very different perspective on the world around you. but sometimes life gets very frustrated . He doesn't see what it is like, or how he WAY over reacts to the smallest of issues or even nothing at all. Learn more about bipolar disorder and relationships by reading our relationship blogs. Try these tips for coping with the inevitable mood swings. its lifelong. His attitude is that he is on his meds, therefore he is justified because he is now "normal". it can be better and worse but not cured if i'm not mistaken. One other feeling you need to confront is “giving up” and the desire to leave the situation. He isnt managing his bipolar well and its really taken a toll on our marriage and life. Try these tips for coping with the inevitable mood swings. My husband done a lot of self medicating which made him abusive to himdelf. i am currently in the process of trying to get on social security/disabillity benifits. I do find it hard to have a converstaion in this manner. To give you my story (in a nutshell) I, to have bipolar husband. Then if I wanted out at that time, I can. I am here to support and love, absolutely, but not to have to be in this partnership alone so much of the time. Bipolar disorder is a serious and extremely complex mental illness. The stigma of mental illness isn’t just connected with those who are ill, but also to those of us on this journey with them. All are affected and it is nobody's fault. I am just worn out by it all and recognizing that I don't want the kids to learn it is okay to speak to your spouse the way he does me when he is like this. It is too lonely, tiring of the same crap and painful on a regular basis. Do you have any interest? You then married quick and added to the mix by the pregnancy. oh and i do understand i can't get diagnosis here. LAKE GENEVA -- Maria Ruby was a lot like other kids when she was growing up. we've got a sick puppy. Living with bipolar is possible but it does take lots and lots of work. do u think i can apply for Social security benefits . As spouses of Bp loved ones, we have to make a choice. Both my husband and son on the BP spectrum are at about the 1/4th mark of severity, both have been under a psychiatrists care for years who I trust implicitly. he says that he can fly planes , treat patients  , he is getting into high risk behaviors with borrowing lots of money. I'm very confused as to whether I'm entitled to any benefit as I have bipolar and I'm on lots of meds, but my husband is self employed. I was planning on posting my own thoughts about my stuggles and torment of living with my husband who has bipolar but your story reflects exactly what i would have said. Been there, done that, as my late husband was bipolar. They are more the implode style. I know for me I have been married to him for 15 years and love him dearly. Don't know if this is any help but hon you are not alone. Hello, I'am married to a BP wife of 7 years. Victory2007, DO NOT GIVE UP SCHOOL NO MATTER WHAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He does not take any pride in what I have built for us by myself. Type 1 is the more severe of the condition and my husband is at the more severe end of the spectrum as he suffers from serious lows (to serious suicidal thoughts) and also goes very high and suffers from mania. Well, I didn't say I always LIKE it when he makes me take responsibility for it, but lets face it, I am a grown up and I am responsible for my own behavior, even with the bipolar disorder. 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